THAT MOMENT : Waking up in Oahu

Punch-Drunk Love (2002)

When I was very little there was a long parade of fictional characters that I simply wanted to be: Egon Spengler, Frederick Frankenstein, Alan Shepard (okay he's not fictional but in my mind it was the Scott Glenn portrayal). These sorta role models continuously changed for me throughout the years, but then, like most people, once I reached my late teens/early 20s, it became less about aspiring to be like certain characters and more about identifying with them. At that age I found myself in Film School surrounded by somewhat likeminded people, and given that very specific period of time, me and my peers had a solid list of new, quirky protagonists with which we could relate: Donnie Darko, Amélie Poulain, Clementine Kruczynski, Richie Tenenbaum, and either of the Lost in Translation characters. Broken people struggling to find happiness and meaning in a hostile world, all to the beat of a hip soundtrack and looking damn good while doing it. My chosen avatar of Hipster Cinema from that era was Barry Egan in Punch-Drunk Love - though the connection I felt was hardly a choice. I was 19 when I saw it first in 2002 and by that age I was a lot more balanced and optimistic than I had been for the entirety of my teenage years; going out in public was no longer the embarrassing ordeal that it'd been for nearly a decade. But that constant ache of discomfort in my own skin, being frightened of people and trying to remain invisible while also desperate for someone who was kind to notice me? I knew it only too well, and like gum to a shoe, that feeling still sticks with me to this day, though it's much less incapacitating. But at 19 it was still fresh -- though at any age, I think all of us would be blessed to have someone like Lena in our lives. 

My initial snobby reaction was that she was underwritten, and maybe I was onto something, but there's a popular fan theory I liked better: at least once in the movie (and also again in a deleted scene) Lena has some outer space NASA footage playing on her TV, and this sorta sparked an idea that maybe she was some kinda alien. Someone even asked Paul about this, and he gave a predictable "maybe" kind of answer, followed by something along the lines of "No one on Earth is that wonderful". The possibility that she's just an abstraction of love and compassion would totally fall in line with the tone of the movie -- actually any of his movies. Though the things that make her wonderful are actually what give her deeper dimensions of realism; in this story it's the world that's abstract and surreal, and Lena and Barry have found each other because they're the only ones who are, by contrast, normal. 

Our biggest anxiety in the movie is the one we share with Barry: hopefully she's not turned off by his eccentricities, and especially not horrified by his alleged "perversion". Most of these worries are put to rest before everything is actually resolved, in a scene that depicts Lena and Barry in a hotel room after they've spent the night together. Instead of some postcoital snuggling and giggling, Lena sits alone on a sofa in a position of casual confidence, talking on the phone with her coworker/Barry's sister. Barry sits up in bed, across from her, wearing a white bathrobe instead of the costume with which we've come to identify him. Lena deflects questions about Barry over the phone, lying for him on his behalf, protecting him. This wasn't just a flirty infatuation; for the first time we feel like somebody actually has Barry's safety and happiness at heart, and suddenly we can relax about the possibility of any kinda misunderstanding surrounding his indiscretions. And in the end she reinforces that when she discernibly disregards Barry's entire confession and only responds with a gentle scolding about how he wasn't there when she needed him. We the audience knew that he first had to slay the dragon, and she may have even known that too, but it was more important that she let Barry (and us) know that she needs him, as much as he needs her. 

- Paul