Quick Ones

  • Do you think Lee Daniels has a butler?
  • Once you've reached the end of your wits, you just end up back at the beginning
  • There's no room for Jell-O at the Inn
  • Break the rules until you get caught. After that, make up excuses
  • What's worse than Christian Rock? Christian Rap
  • The second easiest way to carry a hat is on your friend's head
  • Demons live in my teeth
  • Dress the part
  • Bad things come in threes. Good things come in me
  • The guys in the white lab coats are always the first to go
  • A single "oops" is an "oop"
  • Technically, Michael Keaton has been robbed of about 5 Oscars
  • Exercise your pinkies for an unforeseen event
  • Pie is the best use of fruit
  • Do you think John Carpenter has a thing?
  • Criterion will always feel compromised for adding The Rock and Armageddon
  • It's hard to make a movie in black and white without being pretentious
  • The myth of Twin Peaks is better than the show
  • As punishment, your tombstone will be in comic sans
  • Stay off my back, or I will attack! (And you don't want that)
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