FRENCH FRIES and FULL MOON FEATURES part III: "Bad Channels" and McCain Craft Beer Battered Fries

"It starts with an idea, and it grows organically from there. One thing I've learned is that the crazier an idea the more successful a movie it will be."

- Charles Band

Alongside his responsibilities as Producer, Full Moon founder Charles Band has written and directed much of the studio's output. And in many other cases, he is literally credited with the very official-sounding "Based On An Original Idea By Charles Band" - such as the case with 1992's Musical Science Fiction Comedy Bad Channels. Directed by the equally prolific Ted Nicolaou, the plot involves an alien (and its adorable tech support robot sidekick) taking over a small town radio station and kidnapping human women literally through the airwaves. The alien (described in the film as looking like a giant turd with a porthole) hypnotizes select listeners into thinking they're part of a choreographed, mid budget music video - which allows cameos from real life rockers Fair Game, DMT, and Sykotik Sinfoney. Once the song ends, the women are then beamed like Star Trek into the alien's collection of bug jars. Rock performances aside, the actual score for the movie is by Blue Öyster Cult, so really the whole film is saturated in a fun atmosphere that feels more hip than most other Full Moon features; it could very much be placed alongside Texas Chainsaw 2, Slumber Party Massacre II, Hobgoblins, and Ted Nicolaou's own TerrorVision. Most Full Moon movies either take themselves way too seriously, or absolutely not at all - Bad Channels lands comfortably in between the extremes, making it one of the studio's greater achievements. 

 

"Beer battered"? We're still riding that trend? Oh wait, sorry, "craft beer battered", for an extra spice of pretension. Snarkiness aside, the fries were actually pretty good. Something notable that rarely seems like a strong characteristic until you're faced with it, but all the fries seemed to be roughly the same size and shape - you wouldn't think that would make a difference but it really is a psychologically pleasing consistency. But one really weird attribute that was almost immediately recognized by both of us was that these fries taste like Burger King fries. They don't look or smell or feel like them but somehow they got that indefinable BK flavor that you'd hafta know to know. Does this mean the King soaks his spuds in suds (or however it's done)? In any case we're sorta split on Burger King french fries, but we both agree that something resembling fast food is typically better than the frozen bag rubbish. 

The Movie: B+

The Fries: B