The CGI of 1996

Or, The CGI Shitshow of 1996 - though that would definitely hurt its chances of going wildly viral.

Today I'm here to complain. Actually, poke fun at, which is somehow both more lighthearted but also meaner at the same time. And hey, guess what, my target is not modern movies, but instead I've chosen to pick on my beloved 90s Cinema: particularly 1996, and particularly the special effects, and particularly the computer-generated special effects. 

We were treated to some lovely makeup effects that year (Thinner, Bad Moon, The Island of Dr. Moreau) as well as what I consider to be some really good digital effects (Independence Day, Dragonheart, Multiplicity), but for the most part it was a clunky mess and a definite low point in an otherwise solid decade in the advancement of computer artistry. I can't know exactly why everyone got so overzealous at exactly the same time - maybe the triumphs throughout the first half of the 1990s (Terminator 2, Jurassic Park, Forrest Gump, Toy Story) created a wave of overconfidence in the industry. In hindsight, I applaud the experimentation, but when you bite off more than you can chew it can lead to choking (which is actually the literal plot of a lotta these movies). Here are 8 films from 30 years ago that probably coulda used another 20 minutes in the oven before they were ready for public consumption. 

- Paul 

Twister

I was so pumped for this - I was already really into tornadoes at that time, mostly because I'd suddenly become phobic for some reason. In the theater, I thought it was pretty effective, but apart from the overall bigness of it, I think the sound design is what made it work. Now it spends its life on a TV, and we're left only with its dumb story and horrible dialogue and digital dust clouds. Never for a moment do I believe I'm witnessing a weather event; Wizard of Oz was a thousand percent more believable. 

The Frighteners

This was a really neat Mystery that threw in enough comedy and action to get it that much closer to Ghostbusters. Except that Slimer, Stay Puft, The Library Ghost, et al. were considerably more believable than most of the disorienting cartoons that populate this film. FX shots used to demand so much more attention; you could feel the finesse in every storyboarded frame, and every gesture felt intentional. The big baddie in this is like a cloaked ghost that resembles The Grim Reaper, but some vague swirling graphics place it more in the ballpark of Casper rather than Bergman. 

Mission: Impossible

Look, I don't even know what the hell's going on in this movie at any given moment, and yet there's still some compelling suspense - especially the Tom-on-a-rope sequence. One part that isn't suspenseful at all is the entire climax. DePalma once said that he has no interest in car chases, and if he feels the same about animated helicopters chasing animated trains, his apathy is palpable here. I definitely never feel any sense of peril - not even when the really fake looking propeller blade almost stabs Tom in the neck. 

Escape From L.A.

The trend gains momentum here as the veterans start to dabble in software -- and by "dabble" I mean "gamble with their entire reputation". I was never a fan of Escape From New York, but by comparison... holy shit. A lotta money and effort clearly went into some major set decoration here - except for the parts where it didn't because it's so clearly a poorly generated environment. Carpenter never bounced back from this. 

Mars Attacks!

John Carpenter only made three more features after Escape from L.A. -- Tim Burton has made thirteen since this plunge into pixels, and he's never looked back. Fans of this film will promote the excuse that the effects are "intentionally bad" to further perpetuate the ironic campiness of it. What a crock of shit. I'm sure the guy who just wrapped an Ed Wood biopic had a unique understanding of the difference between "bad special effects" and "intentionally bad special effects", and there was certainly nothing "retro" or "nostalgic" about cheap computer animation. (It saddens me to say, but there still isn't.) Alex Cox and effects wizard Phil Tippett had long wanted to make a stop motion version of this material, and in the weird bizarro reality of 1996, Tim Burton managed to make something less cool. 

The Nutty Professor

Rick Baker got the Oscar for his outstanding makeup effects in this movie. You know Rick Baker, the guy who nabbed his first Oscar for the memorable transformation scene in An American Werewolf in London. In fact, I can't speak for everyone, but I feel like the "turning into a wolf" sequence was more effective than the actual wolf. In this film, Eddie Murphy undergoes several transformations between fat and thin, and those are depicted like some commercial for sour candy, with a lotta cartoony bulging effects and fake exaggerated jiggling. So much for the painstaking attention to canine hair growth and fang lengthening. 

From Dusk Till Dawn

Once again! Here we are in the middle of a Makeup FX Extravaganza - an almost homage to the art form, literally featuring superstars of the industry both behind and in front of the camera. KNB created some truly ghastly and inventive stuff, and we still get entirely tripped up on the tough act of "transformation". It'd been 5 years since the Michael Jackson "Black or White" video wowed us all with its use of "morphing technology" and apparently vampires South of the Border employ that very same technology repetitively and excessively, and it all but undermines all that really cool makeup. 

The Arrival

I feel bad picking on the smaller Alien Invasion Movie of that year, but really it's its own fault. I feel like this was on HBO every few minutes, but I seriously remember nothing from it. Well almost nothing. Spoiler (kinda): there's a twist at the end where we learn that one of the supporting characters is actually an alien disguised as a human. We learn this when the "human" suddenly inverts his knees before our eyes and awkwardly saunters off into the horizon. On paper it's sorta creepy, but my reaction even then was more of a wince at its really crude "reveal" - which, who knows, maybe made it creepier. Either way, it leaves an impression.

STATIC SHOTS

7 Cigarette Smoking Scenes

When there's no more room in Hell for "Eating Scenes" we will begin to address the "Smoking Scenes". For decades it was too commonplace to even take notice - not just in French noir and American Westerns, but in everything, from Looney Tunes shorts to gameshows. It started to be a bit more of a niche in the 70s, and even since then I was left with a zillion choices - but these were the first that came to mind. 

Smoke 'em if you got 'em.

- Paul

Ghostbusters

Cigarette as comedic prop. My father used to let me reenact this gag with an unlit True Blue, getting me that much closer to becoming a real life Ghostbuster. 

The Master

How to pick a single Joaquin smoking scene? Not to discredit either Joker movie but you really need to see the outtakes from this scene to appreciate the nicotine dedication. 

GoodFellas

A truly famous shot in a movie full of famous shots, it exemplifies the cigarette as a permissible prop for an actor to look busy. Add a good pop song and you've got Cinematic Gold. 

Die Hard

An excellent Smoking Movie all around, but nothing beats the peace pipe camaraderie between John McClane and Bill Clay. 

Cat's Eye

Smoking kills, but who cares? Like, seriously. Even if Alan King sends out goons to kidnap your wife and then electrocute her while playing a horrible cover of "96 Tears", it's still so satisfying to light up when you're stuck in traffic. 

War of the Roses

Doesn't matter how long it's been since you quit - if you have to deflect sexual advances from Kathleen Turner, you're gonna need to scratch that itch with something strong. 

True Romance

A last meal, a kiss before dying, a final request. Smoking (and hurling insults) are much more satisfying when there are no more longterm consequences. 

10 Times the Convenience Store Got Messed Up

con·ven·ience store - a store with extended opening hours and in a convenient location, stocking a limited range of household goods and groceries.

You know the setup: if we find ourselves in a convenience store (usually in a movie of the Action genre) you know there's a good chance the Cheetos and Charmin are about to hit the fan. If nothing else, the mortality rate of whoever's working the register is unfairly high; no one is more expendable than the men, women, and children(!) who stand behind the counter awaiting their fate. There's been all kindsa chaos in these mini-establishments but these are the notable moments when we couldn't help but wonder, "Who's gonna clean this up?"

- Paul

Robocop

Just an all around famous film scene, it demonstrates all the hallmarks of this scenario in only 90 seconds (though it's noticeably lite on the violence for such a hard-R flick). The shop owners live (as does the assailant) but casualties include lotsa booze, popcorn, and a good portion of the dairy section. 

Falling Down

In a raging spree of anticapitalist sentiment, the products on the shelves are not bystanders - they are the target of this spontaneous assault. The victims are donuts, aspirin, batteries, and little American flags for ironic effect. 

I Come in Peace

Dolph Lundgren has to ditch his stakeout to address a holdup in progress. The punks shoot out the lights, and in a store full of glass bottles of liquor and aluminum cans of Pepsi, we only end up losing a fridge door and some generic milk. 

Return of the Living Dead III

This is the common situation where the shopkeep pulls a gun on the robbers but ends up getting killed anyway. On a completely unrelated note, freshly zombified Mindy Clarke is devouring the entire Hostess endcap in an attempt to satiate her new and inexplicable hunger. 

From Dusk Till Dawn

Not too much is salvaged from what literally becomes Benny's World of Blood. Ironically the hostages and the perpetrators walk away in one piece (minus a hole in the hand) but Michael Parks and John Hawkes fall victim to bullets, fire, and a questionable explosion which may or may not have been the direct result of popcorn. 

Short Time

Believing himself to be terminally ill, Dabney Coleman fearlessly diffuses a hostage situation without any backup (or clothes). The bomber breaks down and surrenders with every person and Pop Tart left unscathed - until the realization that the ticking bomb was left inside the store proves to be too late. 

Hard to Kill

This is all about body impact. The store owner is shot and falls into a wall of liquor, then Steven Seagal proceeds to hurl the bad guys into wine bottles and potato chips. A mostly tidy job - disregarding the likely pool of blood left from the clerk who took one to the chest. 

Magnolia

Most convenience store mishaps hold little weight throughout the rest of their respective story; even when blood is spilled it's usually forgotten by the plot. Donnie Smith's public indiscretion here ends up looking not so good on his job review which is a major contributor in this tragic character's downfall. 

National Lampoon's Loaded Weapon 1

A parody of most of the scenes on this list plus all the others that came before -- it involves shotguns, Tommy guns, a flamethrower, and a bazooka, and it isn't over until every shelf is cleared by artillery fire. 

Ghost World

What happens when Steve Buscemi has it out for Brad Renfro? A full-blown blaze of fury, which results in a knocked-over chip rack and not much else. 

STATIC SHOTS

Everything's Coming Up Cherries!

When we get excited about something we look for it in everything - eventually to the point that we're convinced it is looking for us. Mother Proulx never raised such a foolish child - I'm well aware that I'm currently all hopped up on a steady diet of cherry sodas, to the point that my pupils are just little cartoon fruits. What I'm trying to say is I'm immersed in a theme and my brain insists on keeping it going, so for the sake of sanity (or lack thereof, who cares) here are 10 notable cherry-related moments from Pop Culture. 

- Paul

Twin Peaks

Whenever I'm poised to purchase a pie, the option of cherry is never on my radar - except when we're on or approaching Twin Peaks day (February 24), and only then do I seem to find its taste to be damn good. And god knows this isn't just me being weird about food again - on the long list of openly fetishized elements of this show, a powerful lust for pie doesn't feel like that much of a deep cut. And no one can sell cherry like Dale Cooper (except maybe Shelly Johnson). 

Super Mario Bros. 2

My favorite of the Super Mario games (some honor, I've only played like four of them), and the biggest reason it's my favorite is probably because of how colorful it is - from the box it comes in to the gameplay itself. My favorite shade of blue is "Super Mario 2 sky blue" and that sky is beautifully punctuated with little bunches of floating bright red cherries. When you collect 5 of them the game presents you with an invincibility star, but that was entirely immaterial - I just got the cherries because I wanted them. 

"Cherry Pie" Warrant

There are hundreds of songs that involve cherries, but when I reached up into the ether of my mind this was the first one that grazed my fingertips. But it wasn't entirely arbitrary - I would consciously nominate this as the anthem to the suggestive side of the cherry's iconography (though this song speeds right past "suggestive" into "literally" town). It appears on Warrant's album of the same name, and between the album cover and imagery in the music video, no one can argue its cherryfied status. 

Hi-Ho! Cherry-O

I'd never even heard of this board game until my son got it when he was still a toddler. To the unenlightened: you spin the dial to determine how many little plastic cherries you're to pick from the cherry tree and place in your basket - most cherries wins. Its rudimentary innocence is charming, but all the functioning parts of this game are respectively gorgeous; the illustrations on the dial and the board would suggest he received some sorta retro "throwback" anniversary edition based on the enchanting 1970s artwork with which they're adorned. And the tiny bright red cherry pieces make it like Super Mario 2 come to life! (And had I had this game as a child that's exactly what I would've used it for.) 

The Witches of Eastwick

Cherries are generally sexy -- I'm not gonna list all the ways it's just an inherent thing. But Lust is a sin no matter how tangental, and the judgement can be severe (especially if you saw this movie before the age of 5). Clearly the attraction to cherries and all that they signify isn't lost on me, but neither are the effects of this 1987 Horror Comedy in which Veronica Cartwright projectile pukes masticated cherry goo all over her living room leaving everything coated in slimy cherry pits. Sing it with me: "Tastes so good make a grown man cry! Sweet Cherry Pie!"

Gambling

Slot machines, scratch tickets, Bingo cards, any kinda game that requires universal symbols has often latched onto the familiar cherry. And I think it's because of that usage of fruit that gambling seemed that much more attractive to me when I was a child. A smoking camel never coerced me into anything, but if you're throwing colorful little cherries at me then I'm sure to bet the house. 

Seinfeld

In a Season 4 episode of the show, Elaine sprays her boyfriend/would-be-attacker Joe Davola in the face with cherry Binaca breath spray. Later in the episode his presence is identified by the smell of cherry. (Just a reminder that when I hear "cherry" this is the stuff I think of, folks.) 

McCartney - Paul McCartney

I openly celebrate this album all the time - partly because of its content, but equally because it's my favorite album cover of all time: and this is my chance to explicitly point out that it's entirely due to the cherries. Photographed by Linda, it added fuel to the fire of the infamous Death Hoax - depicting an empty bowl as an inverse to "life is a bowl of cherries". So it's got spooky subtext too!

Big

There are actually a handful of great food moments in this movie, but this bizarre, probably-ad libbed scene between Josh and Billy is less about appetizing ice cream and more about laughs. I can't imagine it on paper or even Penny finding the words to "direct it" but it was strong enough to make an appearance in most of the trailers and TV spots, just about solidifying it as an Iconic Cherry Moment. 

Max Cherry

Some of you may find this one to be a stretch. There's the door, pal. The rest of you can appreciate the fact that when I hear "Cherry" it sometimes reminds me of one of the great characters of contemporary storytelling. And this isn't a rationalization either: Cherry Bail Bonds does indeed use the red fruit as part of its business logo - because who's wouldn't? 

'95 With A Vengeance

Well it's 1995... again(?). That's right, I'm revisiting the revisit, rollin' with the homies, to infinity and beyond, etc. etc. Five years ago I explored Hollywood's bleak apocalyptic premonitions of what the future would be and how that outlook dominated 1995; no kidding, more than a dozen mainstream movies predicted disease, war, crime, totalitarianism, artificial intelligence, and the resurrection of a murderous cult leader. 25 years later - as in 2020 - it all seemed painfully pertinent. And now we find ourselves in the Fifth Anniversary of that tumultuously pivotal year and suddenly the concept of chronology appears less relative and more urgent; I began 2025 in the throes of Covid-19 as The United States approaches the threshold of an overproduced reboot. Time is a flat circle. 

Last time I took a look at '95 I proclaimed that there weren't enough good movies that year to compile a list. I didn't actually research that thoroughly, that's just a general reflection of that year that I always carry with me; the truth is that 1995, for me, was mired in shortcomings and disappointments, and some of that was rooted in the movies. There were a lotta good films, great films even, but for some reason the extra serving of clunky schlock persistently stands out to me. For the otherwise edgy 1990s it felt like there was a lotta safe, overblown camp that seemed more in line with the worst shades of the 1980s; adding to my aforementioned list of Science Fiction Films, stuff like Congo, Species, Bad Boys, and Showgirls really provide a general sense of '95 Cinema. But more than anything, the movie that mostly threw off my equilibrium was Batman Forever. 

At 12 years old, a more cynical and less intelligent person would suggest that I was simply too old for Batman, that I'd outgrown it, but what actually happened was that the franchise had regressed, severely; Joel Schumacher's goofy Action Comedy was a grave disappointment in my Tim Burton brain, and it's quite possible that this early bruise is when I began to lose touch with the "Blockbuster". I've seen it since, old as I am now, and it comes with a strong fragrance of nostalgia for sure, but after 30 years of many more movies in my mind, many more Batmen on the roster, and much more personal wisdom, it still remains laughably inept in my eyes. Though I still maintain the opinion that Jim did as much for The Riddler as Jack did for The Joker - and appropriately so, Jim Carrey seemed to be the most powerful person in the universe at that exact moment, but in hindsight I find him to be the only reason to ever revisit this particular movie. 

There was a lotta Jonathan Taylor Thomas in the air too. And suddenly Antonio Banderas was in like a million things. Jane Austen had replaced John Grisham as bankable source material. NBC dominated the dial with Friends, ER, Seinfeld, Caroline in the City, and Frasier. Meanwhile most of my TV time went to Absolutely Fabulous, Mystery Science Theater, and Flying Circus reruns on Comedy Central. Top 40 radio was aggressively soulful, with all the biggest hits coming from All-4-One, Vanessa Williams, Simply Red, and, of course, Seal. Even bands like Soul Asylum and Smashing Pumpkins got noticeably softer for a second. I've professed in the past that I find the 1990s to be my least favorite decade of pop music, and it all sorta circles around the scummy drain of this midpoint of the decade. But like I said the last time I roamed these dark halls, I was a depressed, overweight 12-year-old and my only friend was a dog that I had to put to sleep that April; this wasn't the year for me to go out chasing waterfalls, and I feel like a stronger lineup at the box office would've been therapeutic. But by the end of the year I had a new dog. I'd discovered The Beatles and Quentin Tarantino. If I were to be sentenced into an awkward, lonesome puberty then I was going to fashion it into a tolerable (or maybe even enjoyable) experience. A band from the 1960s and a movie from 1994 ended up defining my best experiences of 1995, because in all honesty that's the reward for being alive during any specific period of time: I'm not fully defined by whatever the headlines or Nielsen Ratings or weekend grosses of some calendar year turn out to be - if anything I use popular culture to better orient my own memories to determine when and where and how I was. There are entire social media accounts built exclusively on the attitude of "only 90s kids know" and then show a picture of a Power Ranger; we can read about what the public was into, but to have lived it, breathed it, smelled it, is an open invitation - an assignment - for all living witnesses to tell us what it was like. 

Having said that, I probably spent most of it watching TV.

So yeah, there were actually a lotta good movies in 1995 - and truth be told I probably saw many of them on Home Video in 1996, which is another good excuse as to why this year felt so dry. But quality aside, there was one heckuva quantity - as in, I personally saw a lot of what they were putting out, at least in the mainstream, so at the end of the day, I have some pretty positive things to say about a shit ton of movies -- like, enough to celebrate the 30th Anniversary properly with a complete Top 30. It almost feels unfair to my many omissions from stronger years, but diving this deep into a cursed year may just be a cathartic experience for me. And for you hopefully it'll stir some nostalgia that's less polluted than my own. Too much television watchin' got me chasin' dreams. 

- Paul

1. Se7en

Or Seven as it was called then. I (probably like a lotta viewers) was surprised by its skillfulness; Cop and Killer Movies felt pretty dry and derivative by this time and so to be gifted something with such patience and panache (and savagery) felt particularly exciting. But now we know it was no fluke - it spawned a million imitators (and a title sequence that's still the standard 30 years later) but clearly this film (and its filmmakers) remains in a class on its own. I was already in full Kevin Spacey mode when I first saw it, so his appearance at the start of the final act was a bigger surprise to me then anything they'd written into the movie. 

2. Casino

I went into it in the headspace of "Diet Goodfellas". After a couple viewings it was easy to shake that mistake and digest it as the violent Rock Opera that it is. I still find this era to be Scorsese's peak as a visual artist, and so this epic of cards and dice and slot machines and neon lights and blueberry muffins and beatings proved to be fertile ground for gorgeous photography, transcendent editing, and a tremendous soundtrack.

3. Toy Story

This wasn't much of a surprise; it was the first Disney (or Disney adjacent) feature that I didn't see by accident - though my expectations of a pioneering, candy-colored kids' adventure ended up being surpassed by its pace, originality, and humor. I've loved the entire series but this one still remains my favorite.

4. Heat

A shortage of the glitzy energy found in other Michael Mann movies always prevented this from climbing too high for me, but the mood that prevails in even the more stagnant moments is constantly working on levels we're not even aware of. But clearly my standards are still high - currently the Crime genre (or any kinda movie) doesn't approach this caliber anymore (not even from Mann). 

5. Die Hard With A Vengeance

It was different for a Die Hard movie, it was different for an Action movie; apart from its traditional "realtime" structure, its nonstop pace in a sunny daytime city is an elaborate and expensive standard set by Speed the year before. And by that standard it outdoes the first two installments (in some ways, let's not get crazy).

6. Tommy Boy

This was a casual Saturday matinee for me but I incidentally witnessed a certified classic (as was the 1990s). Though one of the more troubling subcategories that gained momentum this decade was the SNL adaptation - so it usually felt fresh when cast members could pull off a picture that wasn't chained to some 7-minute live sketch; following the John Hughes footprints this movie pulls it off wonderfully. 

7. Forget Paris

My RomCom experience is mostly confined to a narrow period of time - mostly 80s and 90s - but like any genre from any era there are some that rise above the rest. Labeling aside this is a tremendous Comedy with a great cast and a unique narrative structure that makes it more compelling than it needs to be. 

8. Tales From the Hood

90s Horror still keepin' it weird with this entry that probably belongs on the Mt. Rushmore of that very specific brand -- certainly Top 4 Anthology Horror Movies. Around this age I found that "scary movies" always ended up being sillier or duller than I had been led to believe; this movie was advertised as being a bit of a lark, and ended up being darker and better crafted than most other movies that year - obviously, it made the Top 10. 

9. The Usual Suspects

For a lotta folks this movie is: a surprise ending, and not much else. Not for me, I taped it off of Pay-Per-View and watched it every day for months. Throughout the 90s there were a ton of these pulpy Crime Thrillers, and for as many as I consumed this one ranks pretty high. Also makes a good case as to why the roles of Editor and Music Composer should be filled by the same person.

10. 12 Monkeys

Of all the dystopian downers from this year (or actually any year) this one towers above them as the saddest, the scariest, the best-made, and the most original. When Gilliam actually took something seriously, that's when the absurdity played best. At the credit roll I'm still left with the same dazed feeling I had when I left the theater the first time. 

11. Crimson Tide

The last great Tony Scott flick - where the style and the substance reached crazy heights without hitting the ceiling; a supposed rewrite by Quentin, kaleidoscopic cinematography by Dariusz Wolski, and two of the greatest actors of all time (leading an equally dynamic supporting cast) make this my favorite in the submarine subgenre. 

12. Home For the Holidays

Speaking of stellar ensemble casts... More nuanced and less structured than the advertising had us believe (though the final act limps along) it's a casual character study that's never too heavy but never obnoxiously lite - which is an accurate depiction of the Holiday Season. 

13. Apollo 13

I went into it with The Right Stuff as the standard (which is probably unfair - to any movie) but at the end of the day (or three decades) it's too fun and bubbly and exciting to place it in any kinda low regard. (Though this is one of the first times I truly felt a disgust for computer animation.) 

14. Nixon

Biopics gonna Biopic - but an Oliver Stone Biopic has the potential to be batshit crazy, and it is (just like its subject matter) but its brilliance is in how well it balances its paranoid schizophrenia with the button-down formalities (again, like the subject matter).

15. Under Siege 2: Dark Territory

I'm what you would call a Steven Seagal connoisseur (at least from his Warner Bros. days) and so while many of his vehicles may appear indiscernible to a less refined palette, I can assure those philistines that this is an absolutely worthy sequel in tone and structure and is nearly on par with the original. 

16. Castle Freak

Director Stuart Gordon was mostly knows for Horror Comedy -- that is very much not the vibe of this Full Moon Feature that pretty much plays it straight. So when it inevitably veers into terror and gore it's no laughing matter. One of the few movies that makes my skin crawl a bit. 

17. Lord of Illusions

For the entirety of its troubled production schedule, Fangoria was there reporting and I followed that story for over a year. Honestly that's what I remember most about it and what I think about when I watch it now. On its own it's gothic Clive Barker goodness, but it also very much has that personal edge for me. 

18. Tales From the Crypt: Demon Knight

Billy Zane has attracted most of the attention this movie has earned over the years but I wanna use this space to call attention to the crazy ensemble cast of character actors who're clearly having equally as much fun with the material. 

19. Clueless

How did someone go about making such an accurate Period Piece about the current period? Usually hindsight is the most advantageous tool in recreating an era on film but it was as if Amy Heckerling & co. merely held up a mirror. 

20. Braveheart

14th Century Euro history as a Popcorn Movie; it feels reminiscent of the 1950s in that sense, but you update it for the 90s with some action violence and suddenly we have a new standard for the "Epic".

21. Casper

Like The Flintstones, a $50 million budget that has the aesthetics of a grade school diorama. Unlike The Flintstones, genuine laughs and heart and characters we care about. (Sorry, Flintstones.) 

22. Get Shorty

The new John Travolta Crime Comedy was a big deal to me and just about everyone else at that moment. Unfortunately it was no Pulp but it did have its own mood, as well as scintillating performances from Gene Hackman and Dennis Farina. 

23. Four Rooms

With the space I'm given here I'll say: the first sequence (or "room") is one of the worst movies I've ever seen, the second room is passable slapstick with a few laughs, and while the fourth room is still Quentin's best work as a director to me, the third room is the best thing that Robert Rodriguez has ever done. So, it's uneven to say the least. 

24. Waterworld

I knew going in that there was controversy surrounding its production, but I found the finished product to be captivating. My generation didn't receive a ton of nautical adventures but this one certainly worked for me - particularly Dennis Hopper's usual mix of comedy and menace. 

25. The Crossing Guard

For its black & white simplicity, Melodrama is tricky business. The movie smothers us in a world of grief and guilt and never lets us up for air (not even at the end) but there is a definite joy in watching the most talented actors in the world convey that misery. 

26. The Mangler

It gets the edge over Dolores Claiborne as my favorite King adaptation of that year because of its archaic storyline and shameless depravity; an evil laundry machine that eats people up is gonna be one of the more exciting things in any year in film. 

27. Desperado

In an era of violent gunplay this didn't completely stand out to me - I responded to the humor and the clever set pieces but it got lost in the shuffle a bit. In retrospect it's so obviously Robert Rodriguez and his distinctive style (which has all but dissolved these days). 

28. Tank Girl

I initially found it obnoxious, probably because (as I said) I wanted my comic book stuff to be Burtonesque -- it turns out that I just wanted Batman stuff to be more serious. Nowadays I'd be overjoyed if Comic Book Movies were presented as being this ridiculous. 

29. Assassins

Sly and his particular brand of Action may've been on the downslope a bit, but thankfully we have the man of the hour, El Mariachi himself, to add some tension as a colorful bad guy. That & Julianne Moore as an Action Star is always unironically entertaining to me. 

30. Cruel Jaws

a.k.a Jaws 5 (though I wouldn't go spreadin' that around) this Italian Monster Movie is a Frankenstein unto itself, pulling together pieces of other movies and music scores to create one nearly-cohesive collage of terror in the water. I'd say it's two whole letter grades better than Jaws 3-D.