2000-2002 Celebrity Girl Crushes

     The beginning of the new millennium was the height of my teen sexuality. I had matured from girl-curious to boob droopy-face. Dicks were still way cool, in fact I lost my virginity to a boy, but girls were just as exciting.

     The problem was, I grew up in a very predominantly white and conservative corner of New Hampshire. We had one black kid and no one was outright gay. To say my neighborhood was repressed would be a kind understatement. I was aware of a few girls that were kissing-interested, but they were more interested in their Realms Events and LARPING. That did not turn me on. Nor should it turn anyone on...

     So, like most scared adolescent boys, I turned to drooling over sexy celebs. There are a few that stand out; ten in fact. Some I have a more cerebral approach to my crushing, but others...well, I was a horny teenager too, and not always thinking with my brain. 

And I would like to add, that I am VERY PROUD to be bisexual and be living in a country that legally recognizes the union between two people of the same sex. We don't have to keep our mouths shut anymore and hide in the dark. It's freeing. Well, sort of.

- Babes

10. Erika Christensen
She was phenomenal in Traffic, and when that tear fell down her cheek after she takes her first hit, I was over the moon. I am sucker for adorable chubby cheeks and crystal eyes.

9. Karen O
The Yeah Yeah Yeahs fucking rock harder than almost anything that sucked its way out of the 2000s. She put her entire body into her performance and always got very sweaty. That's very important.

8. Kirsten Dunst
Forget the early childhood crush on her from Interview with the Vampire, but I must have watched The Virgin Suicides a million times. She's beautiful, sensitive, and smokes like a champ. I actually had a still image of her from the movie on the top of my graduation cap. A sneaky "Hey, I'm a little queer."

7. Audrey Tautou
I'm not sure if anyone else notices that all of Amelie is shot to enhance her breasts and be a focal point. Definitely revisit if you wanna sneak a peak at a perfect pair. And her character is just so damn sweet. Girls are intimidating. They're mean and divisive. I crush on any girl that's genuinely nice.

6. Scarlett Johansson
Ghost World was the most important movie to me as a 17 year old. I was Enid. And boy did I wish I had a sultry sidekick like Rebecca. I watched the movie a million times and I thought every time that she was going to be a big star. Her scene with David Cross is still top 10 funniest for me. Funny is hot. I wish she did more funny...

5. Alyson Hannigan 
I grew up with Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Willow was always cool. She had a laid back earthy sense of style and loved to read. Reading is sexy if you didn't know. She does this smile where she curls her tongue under her teeth that always sent me over the edge.

4. Emily Watson
Watching her in Punch-Drunk Love, it was very easy to fall in love with her. She was always brightly and tightly dressed, had the most charming accent, and looked past her dearest-love's quirks. Isn't that something we all want in a soulmate?

3. Kate Hudson
This was above my bed for two years.

2. Katharine Isabelle 
Ginger Snaps was described to me as "a werewolf lesbian movie." SOLD. Of course my source was way off, but I really loved the movie anyway. She was completely hot, even with a tail.

1. Anna Paquin (for life)
Her character "Rogue" was always the lesbian that couldn't come out of the closet for me. She couldn't touch anyone without hurting them and that's exactly how I felt back then. But she dolled it up with a sexy streak in her hair and black satin gloves. I love her voice. I know that sounds weird. But the way she walks and talks turns me on. And then several years after X-Men, she came out as bi-sexual. Oh man. 


Tony Kim said...

Love a lot of these ladies, especially Dunst. Re: Paquin - have you seen Margaret (2011)?

P and J said...

Yes - that's why I saw it!

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