Quick Ones

• Do you think Lee Daniels has a butler?
• Once you've reached the end of your wits, you just end up back at the beginning
• There's no room for Jell-O at the Inn
• Break the rules until you get caught. After that, make up excuses
• What's worse than Christian Rock? Christian Rap
• The second easiest way to carry a hat is on your friend's head
• Demons live in my teeth
• Dress the part
• Bad things come in threes. Good things come in me
• The guys in the white lab coats are always the first to go
• A single "oops" is an "oop"
• Technically, Michael Keaton has been robbed of about 5 Oscars
• Exercise your pinkies for an unforeseen event
• Pie is the best use of fruit
• Do you think John Carpenter has a thing?
• Criterion will always feel compromised for adding The Rock and Armageddon
• It's hard to make a movie in black and white without being pretentious
• The myth of Twin Peaks is better than the show
• As punishment, your tombstone will be in comic sans
• Stay off my back, or I will attack! (And you don't want that)