- Fox keeps telling me I can "become a fan of The Simpsons." All this time I never knew I needed permission.
- "The Number One Movie In The Country" is not a review.
- How come Chinese restaurants don't give out those rolls anymore? You know, those rolls?
- In theaters, films are presented in a "WIDESCREEN" format. The black bars at the top and bottom of the screen are the ceiling and the floor.
- The alternate title for The Sound of Music was, This is What Happens When You Find a Stranger in the Alps.
- If Dum-Dums were smarties, then airheads would be nerds. Refrain from Snickers and Chuckles.
- Was the Dukes of Hazzard movie any dumber than the show?
- Steven Spielberg will die in your lifetime.
- It's bad luck to watch Friday the 13th.
- I was told, "Don't eat the yellow snow." Personally, I find any color other than white to be troubling.
- Your thoughts are your own until you Tweet them.
- What's the deal with airplane peanuts?
- Morgan Spurlock turned McDonald's into Starbucks.
- The worst thing about Ghostbusters the movie is "Ghostbusters" the song.
- The Thompson Twins had three members and none of them were twins.
- Girls Meets World insinuates homosexual overtones.
- Where's that Nic Cage?
- A new toothbrush has ambiguous consequences.
- Pleasantville has the worst poster, soundtrack album cover, VHS and DVD art of all said media.
- It's really tedious to listen to someone describe a TV show - even if it's one you like.
Labels: Quick ones