Quick ones

• No one points out the surrealism of talking-animal movies.
• Tell people you were an extra in Spiderman 3. They'll believe you.
• Middle-Earth looks like New Zealand.
• Movie theaters sell you a gallon of soda & offer you free refills. Clearly, they're inexplicably trying to find ways for you to miss the movie.
• When does the decision come to put outtakes at the end of the movie? Are they in the script?
• Aliens are always more advanced, & they always lose. Proof that intelligence is no match for violent aggression.
• Remember Tom Hanks?
• Whenever people remake a movie, they say it's because they "love the original." Does anyone buy this bullshit?
• Deaf people have no aversion to foreign films.
• I'm worried for Abe Froman. Why didn't he show? & what of the other two people in his party?
• People often claim that they love "bad movies." Me, I hate bad movies. I wish there were less of them.
• It would be easier if Spielberg's segment of Twilight Zone: The Movie came at the end so I didn't have to press fast forward every time.
• No one talks about French Connection II.
• I don't get excited by red band trailers -- I've heard the F-word.
• New Zealand looks like Middle-Earth.
• What exactly is the selling point of "From the Studio that brought you...?"
• When you go to the movies, take the straw out of your drink & bend it in half so it has a pointy corner. 10 minutes after the movie starts, lean forward & hold it to the throat of the person sitting in front of you (make sure they don't see that it's a straw), & say, "if you turn around, I'll kill you." Then sit back in your seat; try to do it during a comedy, & see if they laugh at all during the movie.
• I have no opinion of Molly Ringwald.
• In my dreams, I can walk. My legs are strong.
• Not to beat a dead horse, but does anyone really love 3-D? A lotta people complain about it, but no one seems to have any general excitement about it.